Daily Mail, Thursday January 11

"STILL NOT FIT FOR PURPOSE"

Good to see the Mail describing its worth as a newspaper. I'd recomend andrex personally.

Brilliant story, i know it concerns Home Office incompetency and loosing foreign criminals but i read the top line and can't stop thinking that this story is about two old home office ministers in suits boxing the life out of each other in a cage somewhere. Will it be televised? Lots of underlining so it must be serious.

Feel so sorry for Kate Midelton. Poor lass was only complaining at the beginning of week about papz photos and two days later she back on the front of Mail. After Diana died the papers ran like thieves for the moral high ground and still do, blaming the royals for her death when they were just as responsible, but here they are at it again harassing a possible future queen. Deja vu anyone? So she wears a £40 dress just like any normal lass would, big deal.

Daily Mail, January 10

The Daily Mail is reporting old news, anyone remember Dolly the sheep. Poor cow, treated like some common asylum seeker and kept behind bars. Are cloned animals that bad an idea? Half the world is starving so if clone farming can at least try to rectify the situation then i don't see a problem. That headline sounds just like the intro to some Hollywood blockbuster.

Suggestions for tomorro's free DVD;

> Do it yourself laser eye surgery

>Attack of the killer clones

The Express, Tuesday January 9

What Royals would support the Daily Express, the paper that has constantly blamed them for Diana's death. And a crusade don't make me laugh, crusades were about rape and pilllage of the Middle East during the middle ages. Something the Express clearly identifies with judging by that little picture in their title. Seems kind of fitting that a right wing paper clearly out of touch with reality and a longing to return ro the 'good old days' decides on a 'crusade', expect car stickers and t-shirts and constant announcements of how their crusade has won another small victory in the fight for truth and jusice.

Found this on tinternet.

Daily Mail, December 29th


It is Christmas so i feel a really corny christmas cracker joke is in order.

Q-What do u call a woman who put faith before life?


A-A dictionary writer.

That was awful.

I swear the Mail dream up the sensationalist headlines so when we're feeling rather ill and these miracle cures don't happen we all blame the NHS and Labour for it. Not everything can be cured and when flu is 'cured' something just as nasty will evolve to replace it.

I bet that board game is about as 'hilarious' as drinking bleech.


Daily Excess, December 29th

The news is simply googled now, selected by some cat walking on a keyboard. The weather is cheap and easy to report and no one is going to come after the Express for miss reporting it as might happen if they did some real journalism. Nothing better to do than talk about the weather. James Brown dies, Sadam to be hanged maybe a bit better. The express alwyas report the weather and always to great excess. I'll look forward to hearing how many people died in this killer storm. Storms have got a bad rep, i would like to see headlines like '80mph friendly storms to lash Britain'.

Most trusted aide, wouldn't be Paul 'sell your soul you silly twat' Burrell would it?

I would love to bag myself an Eva but its not going to happen, not yet anyway.

Daily Express December 12 o6

This story just enranged me this morning. One of my best friends from home has recently been sent to prison for 2 years. From what i could make out from his mum who was crying down the phone to me i can honestly say a luxury Christmas is something he certainly won't be enjoying.

Christams is a time for merryment an family, grandad getting drunk and telling me and my cousins his 'in the war stories'

For him, Christmas might as well be like everyother week.

He gets half an hours worth of phone credit a week and once a fortnight he gets one visit. A maximum of 3 people are allowed at the visit. He has 3 brothers plus his mum and dad.

So he might get a second helping of Turkey. Hardly luxury. Piss off Express.

I wish the express would stop sensationally forcasting the weather. So there is more rain to come. I wonder what odds you would get in the bookies for predicting rain in the near future. Laugh at you i expect.

Thing about the poor girls in Suffolk is terrible. I really think that instead of simply looking down on this 'underclass' of society it time some sort of government regulated legal prostitution was introduced. It's the oldest profession in the world so it's not just going to go away. Some sort of licenced establishment, where prostitutes could feel safe, be monitoured and have access to sexual health care, the police and social services. Plus the government could tax it.

What do you think?

Daily Mail November 28 2006


DON'T IMPOSE YOUR MORALITY -

Buy the Mail everyday and let it do it for you!

The underlines only mean one thing friends, the Mail means business.

This story concerns and Archbishop hitting out at
government plans to force the church, like any business, to allow the same rights of employment to homosexuals that hetrosexuals enjoy. So the Archbishop's a bit annoyed, well its not like the church has ever imposed its morality on anybody.

The Catholic church are a fine bunch to talk about morality after all that child abuse that was covered up, but this is a blog about the Daily Mail so enough of that. For more ammusement regarding this morality story I urge you all to visit the DM website, best comment comes from an L Humphries, not sure where he's from but that place called Middle England i expect, just to the right of Middle Earth where those nice Hobbit boys come from, anyway, as i was saying. Now i've heard homosexuality called many things before but never "the current model of sexual orientation accepted by a vociferous minority." What is he going on about?

Concerning the story at the top of the page, i went to nice once, never heard anything about it sentencing people to death.


HOWEVER

Diana Day gold from the Express yesterday, how i missed this one ill never know. Anyway, as sure as eggs is eggs (and i've probably said this a thousand times) Monday is Diana day.

A few points

1)If you say 'driver riddle' really qiuckly it becomes 'drivel', which effectively is what this story is.

2)Was the driver playing suduko?

3) Or have the Express finally accepted that the driver was drunk and MI6, Prince Philip and aliens with laser beams had in fact nothing to do with her death at all.

Tomoro in the Express, imigrant bashing, thursday will be house prices and friday will be something about a new stealth tax.

The Daily Express Wednesday November 8th

The Express are suffering from OCD in relation to the
veil, whilst the majority of newspapers have given the debate a rest the Express insist on dragging it out as much as possible, they are obsessed. Not only with the veil but with that picture as well. I hope that poor girl under there, restricted or not, is getting some money for all these pictures the Express is using of her. Whilst i don't agree with the wearing of the veil in certain situations, teaching for instance, this relentless tied of Islamiphobia being driven by the media has got to stop.

The story infact concerns a judge asking a laywer to remove her veil so he could hear her better, she refused and the judge adjourned the case. Therefore this headline is complete nonsense.

As for the 'I was once a celebrity, love it or loathe it, we'll all watch it!'

No we wont.

Daily Mail, October 27th

NO PICTURE IM AFRAID BUT VIDEO INSTEAD

The underlines are back, and about time too. I said they would be as well.
So £300 to park at your home, i'm sure this is an invented story picked out of
some piece of new goverment legislation. Anyway, to right too. Does anybody really need
some fancy 4x4, unless of course it's needed to take precious Andrew and Penny to the
private school down the road because the state school just will not do.

The women who never have sex, next to a picture of Trinny and 'Trashy' - please be a link between the two stories!

The tories are doing really well to be the everyman party, Cameron is acting more and more like Blair (check out video below) and now a senior tory MP has decide to crash the lib dem party and leave the wife and kids for a Lawrence Llewelyn Bowen wannabe.